I want to improve my meaningful connections with family and close friends. When I speak with others dear to me, I will explore my supportive core values—for example, doing dishes so they can relax or helping fold laundry so my partner can focus on their tasks. Meanwhile, I must be careful not to trigger my codependency. I am not doing so much that I neglect my well-being.
Rediscovering Connection: A Journey Towards Self-Worth and Meaningful Relationships
The question I should ask myself.
🚀 Am I doing the work out of Fear or Joy?
How can I remember ⚡ to think about that question? 🤢
If I want to attend any social event, I can slow down my mind through meditation. For me, it’s all about creating a large enough gap between reacting and socializing with people. If the relationship is meaningful, I will do what is needed to keep my mind at peace.
Another perspective raises questions:
Why must the relationship be meaningful for me to be a joy?
Why can’t I find happiness and give my whole positive self away without fear? 😎
Before improving my connection with friends and family, I must find a reason to support the following statement.
I Am Worth it!
Story Time ✨
Many times throughout the day, I’m hit with tasks and thoughts of not being enough for myself. I can try to justify my worth because I exist. All I need is myself. Speaking to a coworker, I learned nobody can redefine my existence or worth. However, somehow, a trauma is locked inside of me. When I was a young lad, I found myself isolating. My father didn’t treat me well when I was younger. Later, I came to know that my dad’s parents were abusive to him.
I regularly overwork, eat sweets, or numb myself with food and movies. What has helped me so far is awareness. I’m trying to forgive my father. Writing about these events may give me a way forward.
I have not reached a connection with myself. However, I know that it exists, and therefore, I exist. I must continue to slow down to become aware. Then, I can further improve my meaningful connection with family and close friends.
Well, that is for rediscovering a connection. Feel free to leave your thoughts below if any words resonate with you. 😊
Occasionally, I come across gems in my favorite problem area. [[How can I meditate before acting]]. In particular, I would like to explore how I can [[Schedule time to mediate to keep the balance]].
Balancing Act Navigating Meditation and Distractions in Daily Life
To find balance, I must create a schedule to help me slow down and reflect on my thoughts. My goal is to meditate in the morning and evening. Similarly, the [[45-minute Meditation is required to reach my mind peacefully]]. I can mitigate the negative thoughts that affect me. I can meditate to slow them down for the evening to feel better for a moment. For example, when I eat mindfully, it takes the mind 20 minutes to register that I’m full or done eating. Likewise, it takes the mind 20 minutes to calm down to receive the wisdom.
Sometimes, patience comes in many forms. [[To wake up the whole body, I need to feel pain across the body]]. Ignoring the pain and allowing myself to listen and continue to note will give me wisdom. The practice will allow me to see what is in my mind. Then, I can answer more and be more attentive to the information around me.
Story Time: Pokémon Go ✨
However, I will be lost if I play games, work past 10:30 p.m., or am distracted. Of such caliber, [[My morning routine got interrupted because I saw a notification for Pokémon Go]]. My phone sent me a promo code for Pokémon Go. I felt inspired and curious to see what the notification would reward me. Later on, I reflected on the event and had many thoughts. I spent too much time on the app. I can’t have it installed. Too addictive. My morning routine got interrupted because I saw a notification for Pokémon Go; I decided to give it another go. I spent 2 hours on it and finally decided to delete it cos it was too much work. I went on YouTube and found a video on deciding which Pokémon to keep; the YouTuber, Poke Daxi, suggested using a search query for PVP. I’m sharing it cos I found it helpful in sorting through junk Pokémon.
0-1attack&3-4defense&3-4hp
Also, he suggested another search query for raid ranks.
`4attack&3*`
More Excitement 🚀
Meanwhile, I’m excited about using the star ⭐ in the game! It will be so much fun preparing for labeling and transferring my Pokémon. I can’t wait to free up space and organize my Pokémon collection!
In his video, he recommended going to a rank checker to decide which Pokémon are worth keeping. However, after 2 hours, I decided to give up because there was lots of competition, and I preferred to spend my time growing spiritually.
What now? 💖
Ultimately, I learned that I need to use my time wisely. In the future, I figured I would share my experience in writing so that, hopefully, others don’t fall into the endless trap of rewards.
During a CoDA meeting, somebody mentioned a quote to the group. [[Like Hugging a Red Balloon Experience life and let go]]. I was still waiting for an answer when I asked the group about its origins. However, my gut feeling told me it has roots in experiencing life inside of overthinking.
💖 Become Mindful Recognizing Cognitive Distortions and Finding Balance in Life
The red balloon is similar to using the healing code. The author, Alexander Lloyd, asks the listeners a vital question. What would I do with the remaining minutes if I had a short life?
I asked, “Why am I afraid of experiencing life?”
Right off the bat, A memory of a friend popped into my mind. I don’t have to experience everything, but it played out through the mind. However, I need to keep my thoughts balanced cos I can overthink.
For example, skiing is a frill-like kissing experience.
I like to try many things, such as fresh mountain air, peacefulness, views, and travel while staying in a cabin. More so, skiing is a technique, an exciting challenge with the combinations of many benefits. Meanwhile, following my interests and experiencing life can either bring suffering or overthinking to its knees. When suffering is processed, I can focus on happiness.
Moreover, the experience can lead to the desire to prevent holding on to anything. I can continue to have these thoughts in my mind, but it would be great if I stumbled upon something exciting. Something so great that it will push me to continue to seek instead of think. One way I can seek this freedom is through peaceful meditation. I am going to my inner being and seeing what my mind has been up to.
🚀 Recognizing Distortions In My Thinking
Returning to [[Recognizing Distortions In My Thinking]], continuing to overthink my experiences can lead to suffering. While working with my therapist, she shared a unique chart that has given me the ability to catch and question my experience. The chart has five columns: emotions, situation, thoughts, re-framing, and conclusion. It’s vital to question self-worth here. Knowing that [[I Am Worth it]] and justifying my worth [[Because I Exist]]. My day is at the max, and thoughts push me to think I am insufficient. Therefore, I need to keep an eye on the ultimate balance, a slice between what is real and present and what is a thought. Spending too much time with thoughts will take me away from the present moment and create much suffering in my system.
Below, I’m sharing my cognitive distortions tool with you. Feel free to use it any way you wish. If you have any questions, feel free to ask them in the comments below. If you enjoyed the passage above, let me know via like comment, or both. 😊
Emotions
Situation
Thoughts
Reframe The Thoughts
Conclusion
Rate Intensity 2,3,4,6
Where were you? What was going on?
What went through your mind? Proof for and against?
Identify the distortion for each thought.
Have any of your preconceptions may have influenced thoughts
Welcome to meaningful connection, where I share July resonating ideas, thoughts, and realizations for those who want to grow mindfully in 7 mins. I will try to answer the following questions: let me know how I do. Meanwhile, see if you can find the answer.
“What would a miraculous change in your own life look like overall?
“If we just smile to it, it will lose much of its strength. Mindfulness is the energy that allows us to recognize our habit energy and prevent it from dominating us.”
“How could you personally make a DISHONEST effort to working the Steps and Traditions?”
“What are your personal Barriers to Success in working the Twelve Steps and Traditions?
Watch me try to summarize the above paragraph; it’s hilarious!
👓 What’s New?
I focused on my CoDA studies during August, explicitly covering the 12 promises. Meanwhile, I sincerely wanted to start practicing my driving skills to avoid depending on others to get me to a location. While in Brooklyn, I could attend a block party and try to be social while not needing a car. Finally, misuse of senses.
🔔 What is Resonating?
During August, I chose something that I rated a high rating of 4 Vye’s! While I had the bell ringing, I decided the 📥 A Study of the 12 Promises PRELUDE.
“PRELUDE: I can expect a miraculous change in my life by working the program of Co-Dependents Anonymous. As I make an honest effort to work the Twelve Steps and follow the Twelve Traditions.”
As I answered the three questions, I decided it would be helpful to share my answers.
“What would a miraculous change in your own life look like overall? Remember, the miraculous change that we are seeking is in ourselves, not others. Consider changes to your thoughts, emotions and actions.”
Change in my life free of seeking happiness from the outside objects/persons. Meditation has helped me pause and gain insight. Remembering to smile helps me disengage the negative thoughts. It’s from the book The Heart of the Buddha’s Teaching.
“If we just smile to it, it will lose much of its strength. Mindfulness is the energy that allows us to recognize our habit energy and prevent it from dominating us.”
Similarly, in the book The Secret, I can position my thoughts for positive, attractive energy.
“How could you personally make a DISHONEST effort to working the Steps and Traditions?”
For me, the dishonest effort is not reviewing my faults and aligning them with the steps or traditions. Especially before sharing, I should write down exactly which pattern I need to prevent, especially when it hits on the topic of 💭 Running into the Fire the Desire to Expand. Another way of thinking is asking what if I’m a workaholic and overworking/overthinking?
In Buddha’s teaching, the first Nobel Truth speaks on recognizing the suffering, in my case, the unmanageability. Then, seeing the energy moving all the time, I love working on the issues at the moment and learning from experience and, in other words, reflecting on a moving train and treating it like a game. Telling others what to do is different from the right path. It is best practice for me to have them ask. I’m not good at this truth yet, but I want to recognize the suffering and adjust.
“What are your personal Barriers to Success in working the Twelve Steps and Traditions? (time, space, other people, responsibilities, finances, housing, education, employment, transportation, other interests, etc.)”
For me, it’s not enjoying self-love, spending too much time being productive, worrying about nutrition, and not being good enough. Essentially, 💭 Running into the Fire the Desire to Expand. Examples include not going to bed on time or setting up boundaries with me or others. Meanwhile, I forget my self-worth altogether.
While answering these questions, I started listing out some tools for recovery. I will continue to use The Healing Code while I pray/meditate to break through the wheel of suffering.
Moving away from CoDA, I craved loving kindness for myself in the past. I wished for the ability to drive a car and needed ways to afford it. Then I found 📥 10 CHEAP RENTAL CAR HACKS That Will Save You Money. The title is super clickbait, but I needed to research that area. On a lighter note, The Deal Guy tells me to pay attention to the following points.
For August, I will choose a topic sprouting #note/🌱 that needs to be elaborated upon further. The thought I decided was 💭 Visiting a friend at the block party. I remember feeling overwhelmed and feelings of weakness. I felt that way because, at the block party, I couldn’t but feel not good enough. I was not doing enough. I spent money on charcoal and party plastic cups. However, I hate plastic waste and I felt terrible about myself. I also have anxiety about talking to others, putting pressure on my friend to help me through the day, and cooking to get my mind off it. I don’t know it was hard. After all the hard work, I met a girl, but I don’t know if she’s real.
Then I thought to myself – Why do you expect others to complete me?
Block parties are wasteful, unsustainable, loud, and confusing. I had a lot of frustrations because I didn’t understand what I needed to do there to help my friend. And also, I put myself into a position with many people. Very uncomfortable. I don’t know if I want to do this again. Then, all I thought about was running errands, not making friends. My experience led me to learn I need to find a way to practice doing small talk in large group gatherings.
I could have done better; feel free to add your thoughts. If not, let’s see what’s going on in mental nourishment.
🥑 Mental Nourishment
Throughout August, I had many thoughts focused on the mind, and Buddhism. The first runner-up is 💭 Misuse of senses. I remember feeling concerned, dirty, sad, and curious feelings. I felt that way because at night I overslept and had my mom’s birthday party. Some of my happiness was coming from dating apps. I allowed it to get to my pleasure senses, then positioned my mind to get some pleasure from adult sites. I deserve to see the pictures of what it looks like and explore. Later on, I went on Google, and I came across a Reddit post. The post taught me that I need to practice the four noble truths. In particular, refrain from the misuse of the senses. For example, I should not look at people lustfully or commit adultery. In a Reddit post, somebody mentioned the following.
“Middle way would be * in moderation and without * as long as you are not a Buddhist monk.”
Meanwhile, I couldn’t help but make the connection to the CoDA Denial Pattern – I didn’t acknowledge my feelings and let them go. Instead, I allowed myself to numb out. My plan for the future is to continue to meditate to notice my strong negative feelings and desire for self-care while asking the question of what little things I can do to help my mind be at ease.
In the same vein, 💭 after Saturday meet-up. I remember feeling sadness. I felt that way because of dating apps. Then I got impatient that I was alone and didn’t meet anybody. Then I thought about eating a lot of sweets at night. Also, I came home to an empty apartment again. My feelings of negative pressure were overwhelming. Later, I looked at the thoughts in Buddhism and the attributes I must learn. I concluded that I needed to review the previous learnings in the other thought note and recognize that I was in a denial pattern.
I had many other thoughts; that insight keeps me focused. Feel free to let me know your thoughts. Otherwise, let’s keep on trucking to the stream of consciousness.
🚿 Stream of Consciousness
I am trying to untangle myself from useless, free, unpaid dating apps that don’t bring any women back but experience. I’m stuck in fear mode and adhering to the zodiac signs to choose the love of my life. Last year, I met that person and somebody who broke my heart and lied to me about their feelings. Many times, I try to forgive her in my heart.
My body craves love, and I don’t know why I can’t give myself enough. A part of me wants to run away and experience life more, and the responsible me is like your crazy. Your family is nearby, and what will you do with your job? It’s so frustrating. I worked at my post for ten years, and I cannot take a sabbatical to reestablish what the heck is my life’s purpose. My goal was to find some farming internships and gain some life experience. I could even start my farm near the mountains to go skiing while enjoying the fresh mountain air. I want to taste that life, but I don’t know how.
Well, that’s pretty much it for August, let’s see what Mr. AI Assistant tells me to do.
✨AI Assistant
Had told me I need to work on the following. What do you all think?
The content is well-structured and organized, with clear headings for each section. The author shares personal experiences and thoughts related to CoDA studies, driving skills, block parties, and mindfulness. The use of links to external resources adds value to the content.
To improve the post, consider the following actions:
Add more context and explanation about CoDA studies and the 12 promises to help readers better understand the topic.
Provide more specific examples or anecdotes related to the author’s experiences at the block party and in practicing small talk in large group gatherings.
Explore mindfulness techniques in more detail and provide practical tips for incorporating them into daily life.
Include a brief summary or key takeaways at the end of each section to enhance readability and help readers grasp the main points.
Consider adding images or visuals to make the post more engaging and visually appealing.
Overall, the content is informative and engaging, and with these improvements, it can become even more valuable to readers seeking insights and personal growth.
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✨ I’m pretty happy with what I’m doing now. What am I doing? I was creating a #sketch and #Blender and decided to draw over the #gray box. Let’s go back to #Krita and it came out. Really cool but I like the little #Minecraft look and feel.
