Welcome to meaningful connection, where I share March resonating ideas, thoughts, and realizations.
👓 What’s New?
A significant departure from my notes, I decided to pause on the reviews and focus my energy on what’s resonating, feelings, and thoughts. I want to continue refining my discoveries to build meaningful connections with the content I consume. I made the subconscious choice because I needed to do something more vital with the content. Moreso, it took a lot of copy-pasting and tweaking queries throughout the week to get my monthly review together. After that, I plan to revisit the thoughts and morning pages. In addition, I’m practicing the CE 5 Protocol and Healing Code, which calms my soul and provides growth.
In other news, I added a new menu on my blog to represent you. I will draw a line and your initials when you donate at any time. The more times you donate, the thinker the line will get. First and last initial near the bar.
🔔 What is resonating?
I listened to Mary and Ken talk in CoDA UK for steps 8 and 9 (https://codauk.org/ken-and-mary-2019/). I remember being avoidant with my family and letting my authority figure of fear control me. Then the discovery about my childhood interaction with others left me wondering: What do amends look like for me? Because for the longest time, I had blamed the outside world for my feelings. It has left me seeking balance and wisdom. I will find balance through continuously journaling and reflecting on the areas of my interest. In particular, it’s good for me to monitor my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health.
Forgetting to pray and pause is a common theme in my life. I quickly get excited about cooking. When I cook and try to improve my health, I spend copious hours understanding and implementing ideas. Where is the pause button? Mary and Ken discuss the concept of chasing for an answer. Am I in a place to hear the truth? For much of my life, I shut those thoughts off subconsciously and feared the reality of the situation. In CoDA, its a progress and not perfection. I found a small silver lining, praying and hanging signs to remind me to pause. It’s okay not to know myself at the very moment and to be lost. For now, I will find myself soon. It is remembering that I cannot always let fear be my authority figure.
Fear is a figure that blows through my boundaries, not a loving Higher Power who wants the best for me. I could skip filling my plate with complete nutrition or leave a few dishes in the sink. Overall, the problem I aim to solve is moving from a position of weakness to a more balanced lifestyle. Meanwhile, I know I cannot control and blame others but improve myself.
🌻 What’s Growing?
For the month, I will choose something that is sprouting and needs to be elaborated upon further. The most exciting thing to guide the mind will be questions that require complex answers. Questions have many answers too. Some time ago, I started collecting my top 12 favorite problems to find solutions. It will guide me to search for information instead of mindlessly highlighting everything I see on the interwebs. Feynman coined the idea to chip away at challenging issues in life.
The plan is to continue questioning the content I consume and testing it against the question. The problems that come from life very well reflect my core values. For example, if I want to expand my ability to show kindness to others, I must ask the following question. How can I find balance while having the desire to grow? Which lead me to CoDA step 4 and 5. I must keep an inventory of my actions toward others and promptly admit when I’m wrong so I can reflect and grow as a human being to society.
🥑 Mental Nourishment
Throughout March, I had many thoughts that differed from my objective notes. However, most of the time, the feeling is inspired. I plan to find a better way to resurface those feelings in my notes, but I’m going based on what I can dig out by modified time.
Speaking to my friend about dating, he made a connection to resumes. The profile is like a highlight of the best version of myself. After I meet the person, I can further elaborate on my vulnerability, weakness, and plans for the future. He mentioned that it is essential to maintain my anonymity for purposes of equality. Until I know them and they are “safe” to share with, I might want to keep parts of me hidden.
For example, perhaps it wouldn’t be a good idea to share my past trauma. 🤷🏻♀️ I’m proud of my journey personally, but I’ve noticed certain words trigger a misunderstanding (like codependent), so I leave them out. Further into the future, my grandmother told me that couples rub off each other over a while and learn what love entails. In other words, I can understand love when I sense the inner suffering of my better half.
I plan to validate my life with what I love to do to attract the correct type of energy.
🚿 Stream of Consciousness
As March passed, I started doing fewer daily, weekly, and monthly reviews. My therapist suggests I focus my energy only on gratitude and feeling my feelings. I decided to change because I felt overwhelmed with my desire to cook in the keto lifestyle. Since my weekends include art, shopping, and cooking, I want to involve myself spiritually and take more vacations during the week, so my life goes smoother.
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